


Old Wounds

by Gabby (Kirahsoka)



Series: Clouded Light [3]
Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars: Rebellion Era - All Media Types, Star Wars: Rebels, Star Wars: The Clone Wars (2008) - All Media Types
Genre: Canon Compliant, F/F, Moving On, Old Masters, Overprotective Ahsoka, Rationally Irrational Barriss, Secrets, Trust Issues, Truth, barrissoka, from a certain point of view
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-21
Updated: 2019-11-02
Packaged: 2020-12-24 07:37:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 16,929
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21095825
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kirahsoka/pseuds/Gabby
Summary: Ahsoka Tano fights to restore freedom to the galaxy with her once friend, then betrayer, and now lover Barriss Offee. A fateful meeting on Tatooine and an unexpected Rebel transmission send the women on a journey through their past. Can they accept some wounds can't be healed?[This is Part 3 of theClouded Lightseries. Though, reading the other two parts isn't required to understand this story.]





	1. Detour

**Author's Note:**

> Assuming you have basic familiarity with canon events, this story should stand on its own. However, reading "Restoration" (Part 2) will provide additional relationship context for Ahsoka/Barriss, if you are interested.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> While on a mission in Anchorhead, Barriss gets distracted by a boy with a familiar name.

Barriss surveyed the sun-bleached town. On a positive note, there appeared to be no Imperial presence. Of course, there were also a plethora of locals eyeing her and very little cover. Anchorhead wasn’t exactly a model location to stay unnoticed. _What self-respecting rebel chooses this place for an illicit pickup?_

Moving quickly through sand-hardened streets, she scanned for the drop site. Finally locating the local cantina, Barriss rounded the back and worked her way down chipped walls. _There it is._ Releasing the false panel, she slid the crate inside and then resealed the space.

Slipping back onto the street, Barriss set a course for the outskirts of town. She was ready to be gone. Not to mention, the idea of beating Ahsoka home gave her no small level of satisfaction. _We’ll see who keeps who waiting today, Tano._

A beady-eyed teenager came stumbling out of a small alley and nearly collided into her. “Stop playing the hero, Skywalker!” Not even acknowledging Barriss, the boy scrambled down the street.

_Skywalker?_ She couldn’t help herself and peeked around the corner. There were two more teenagers surrounded by three brawny, human males.

The older of the duo was crumpled against a building, holding his ribs. “Get outta here, Luke. This is my problem, not yours.”

“No way, Biggs.” Fixing a determined expression, the younger boy stepped in front of his friend and lifted fists. “You got a problem with him; you got a problem with me.”

“Your funeral, kid,” one of the men remarked lazily. He waved a hand and the other two attacked.

Skywalker fought valiantly, even managing to land an occasional blow as he spun in and out of their grasp. However, he was outmatched and outnumbered. It was only a matter of time.

Barriss chewed her lip. She shouldn’t get involved. _Still._ There was a shining strength to the boy’s essence. The devoted and tenacious effort to protect his friend, no matter the cost, reminded her of the woman currently in Mos Eisley.

The lead ruffian apparently got impatient and decided to join the fray. Strengthened to three, they swiftly backed Skywalker into a corner.

Biggs half-rolled and half-lunged toward them, grasping at a pair of beefy legs. That only got him a vicious kick to the head. The young man yelped and then went limp.

Skywalker gave an enraged cry and charged the group, punching wildly. However, he was soon pinned to the ground.

Her indecision vanished. Barriss flew down the alleyway and swept her leg through one of the attackers. He dropped to his knees, and she landed an elbow slam onto the back of his head. Everyone gaped at the unexpected arrival of a new foe. Barriss didn’t allow them time to process and immediately spun into a dropkick of the leader.

The boy grinned at her and leapt up, pouncing on the remaining enemy. All three were sprawled on the dust in under a minute.

Luke raced to his friend and shook him. “Biggs! Hey! Can you hear me?”

Barriss knelt on the other side of the unconscious young man. “Let me look him over.” She pulled her hood back and began examining the injuries.

“Wow,” Luke breathed, jaw hanging open. Then, his face flushed. “I mean, um, thanks for your help.” He stuck out a hand. “Luke Skywalker. Very nice to meet you.”

She smiled and returned the handshake. For some unknown reason she could never identify, the woman used her real name. “I’m Barriss. You were quite courageous.”

His already ruddy cheeks turned scarlet. “I’m not really, but I couldn’t leave him. Just because he owes them a few credits doesn’t give them the right to cripple him.”

“Indeed.” She checked the ribs and lifted eyelids, subtly reaching out with the Force to prod the head injury. “I think he’s alright. It’s a mild concussion and some heavy bruising. However, we should probably take him somewhere safe, before they wake up.”

“Yeah, good idea. Would you help me carry him to the Tosche Station? They have a medic there, who can treat him.”

“I have no idea where that is, but I’m happy to assist.”

He grinned brightly. “Thanks.”

There was a groan and a thick voice muttered, “Luke? That you? What happened?”

“Oh, nothing much. I saved your life with the help of a beautiful lady.” Luke cringed as if his flippant response had been the worst idea he’d ever had and studiously avoided her eye. “Um, I mean, everything’s fine. Go back to sleep.”

Biggs mumbled, “Right. Great.” Then, his head lolled back.

Barriss chuckled. “Shall we go?”

They lifted the gangly Biggs between them, carrying him down the alley. “This way,” Luke grunted.

Three streets over, they reached a power station that appeared to house a vehicle repair shop and supply store. Luke indicated a bench in the large, open foyer, where they deposited Biggs.

Several teenagers rushed up to them. A blonde girl around Luke’s age sat beside Biggs with a worried expression. “What happened?”

Luke grimaced. “Nardos.”

There was a murmur of understanding. “I’ll find Y’udi.” The girl vanished through a side door.

Barriss removed her askew cloak and slapped sand off the navy-blue fabric. As the woman shrugged it back on, she noticed Luke’s friends ogling her.

A boy of perhaps sixteen said to her chest, “Who’re you?”

Luke piped up, “She saved me and Biggs.”

The teenager snorted and not so casually flexed his arm muscles. “That explains it. I knew you couldn’t fight off Nardos by yourself, Wormy.”

Barriss cocked an eyebrow. “Actually, Luke did well. It was his scrappy and impressive display against massive odds that caught my attention.”

Luke reddened as two of his friends slapped him on the back. A sour expression tinged the older boy’s face, but he didn’t continue his taunting.

“Well,” Barriss continued, “it’s time for me to get going.”

“Wait!” Luke exclaimed. “Can I, uh,” his gaze darted around before he rushed out, “give you a lift somewhere?”

Her first inclination was to decline, until she saw the others snickering behind Luke. The sour-faced boy was egging them on by twirling an index finger to the side of his head and mouthing, ‘Delusional’.

Barriss put as much warmth into her response as she could manage while wanting to punch a teenager. “That sounds lovely, if you don’t mind.”

There were hanging gapes from everyone but Luke, who lit up like both Tatooine suns. “No problem at all!”

She took his arm. “Lead on then, my valiant escort.”

Luke’s cheeks tinged pink, and he awkwardly guided her to a battered landspeeder parked outside. Sweeping a random collection of parts off the front seat, he gave a clumsy bow. “So, here we are. Uh, do you need help getting in? Yeah, I’m supposed to do that, right?” He reached for her waist and then reconsidered. Frowning, Luke assessed her and then the seat, clearly undecided on how to get her into the speeder in an appropriate manner.

Barriss suppressed a grin. “Will you lend me your arm to steady myself on, while I climb in?”

His expression cleared. “Absolutely!” Lifting his arm, he stood rigid as she pretended to grip it for stability.

The earnest face contained such anxious concern that Barriss had to resist a wicked impulse to lose her balance. She settled on the passenger side. “Perfect, thank you. My transport is at the south end, on the outskirts.”

Luke blew out a relieved breath and leapt into the driver’s seat. “Near Beggar’s—the canyon range?” Getting an affirmative, he rolled his engines up.

They whipped into motion at breakneck speeds. Barriss bit back a curse as the speeder jolted and rocked. The boy seemed to be deliberately choosing the most difficult, roundabout route possible. Though, she had to admit being impressed. His reflexes were incredible. _The Force is strong with this one._ Barriss could sense the instinctive focus radiating off his aura as he flew past buildings and careened through narrow alleyways. _Hmm._

He barely skidded around an alarmed group of gesticulating Jawas and grinned at her. “That was a close one.”

The grin struck yet another chord. Barriss was nearly positive Ahsoka had mentioned her master being from Tatooine. She yelled over the whining engine, “Tell me, is Skywalker a common name around these parts?”

“Don’t think so. I’ve never met anyone else with my name, anyway. Why?”

Barriss pursed her lips. If there was no established family here that left a more intriguing possibility. “I knew a man named Skywalker once and was wondering if you might be related is all.”

His eyes swerved to hers. “Really? Was he a pilot?”

Rolling words around, she finally replied, “He did quite a few things, but yes he was an excellent pilot.” She pointed at her speeder bike, which had now come into view.

Screeching to a stop beside it, Luke clenched the driver’s wheel. “It could be my father. Was his name… Anakin?”

Her lips parted. “Yes.” She hadn’t really expected her wild idea to be accurate. _Does that mean he survived the purge? Ahsoka’s intel was so certain._

“He was a navigator on a spice freighter,” Luke continued excitedly. “Does that sound like the man you knew?”

“No, I’m afraid not. I suppose he could have changed professions since I last saw him, though. How long ago was that?”

“Not sure exactly. He died before I was born, so at least fourteen years ago.”

“Ah.” Barriss grimaced. “I’m sorry, Luke. I knew him then and he didn’t have any children, a romantic partner, or any family really. And he definitely wasn’t on a spice freighter. It’s certainly an odd coincidence, but maybe it’s two different people with the same name.”

His face fell. “Oh. It was worth a try.”

_Still. What are the chances? And they both died around the same time? Perhaps, Skywalker survived just long enough to father a child? Or… he already had. _Barriss now firmly believed the Jedi code on attachments was inherently flawed. Members of the Order straying outside of it didn’t shock her as it would have when she was young—especially an unconventional Jedi like Anakin Skywalker. _If I hadn’t been so invested in their skewed mindset, I never would have given up Ahsoka. I never would have done alot of things._ Shutting down that line of thought, she refocused on the disappointed face beside her. “Didn’t mean to get your hopes up.”

He shook his head. “Not your fault.” Luke gazed at the twin suns blazing in the pale, morning sky. “It would have been nice to find out more is all. My aunt and uncle don’t talk about my father. I had to beg them to get the little bit I do know.”

_Huh._ If her improbable suspicion was true, that fit. They could believe they were protecting their adoptive child from Jedi-hunters or those interested in the offspring of the purported Chosen One. _Like Palpatine._ The spice freighter story might easily be a lie.

Barriss understood the concern but disagreed with their strategy. Luke’s connection to the Force was too strong to hide forever. On Tatooine, it may be viable, assuming he lived his entire life as an isolated moisture farmer. _Doubtful. Not this one._ Once he entered a wider galaxy, his abilities would become apparent to those more familiar with the signs. Knowledge would allow the boy to protect himself better. Of course, it wasn’t her choice to make. _I don’t even know if I’m right._ “I wish I could help. Maybe you’ll discover more one day.”

“Hope so.” He ran a hand through his shaggy, blond locks. “Well, thanks again. Are you going to be in the area for awhile? Seems like you’re new here. Maybe we—I could show you around or something?”

She smiled apologetically at the eager face. “I’d love to if I could. However, I’m headed back to Mos Eisley and then off-planet.”

His shoulders slumped. “Oh, ok.”

Wanting to give him something, Barriss added, “Though, I plan to pass through Anchorhead occasionally in future. So, we might run into each other again. Never know.” She leaned over and kissed his cheek. “In the meantime, stay out of trouble, Luke Skywalker.”

A vacant grin formed, and he nodded vigorously. “Absolutely.”

Barriss hopped out of the speeder. Replacing her hood, she started up her bike and gave him a little wave.

Luke waved back and flashed an endearing grin. Then, they sped off in opposite directions.

_______

Barriss coughed heavy smoke and adjusted the throttle on her malfunctioning speeder. It sputtered and then cut out once more. “Blast it, bike! Who do you think I am? Ahsoka?” Surveying the rocky terrain, she scrubbed soot from her forehead. Barriss was halfway between Mos Eisley and Anchorhead with no civilization in sight. “Great. Substandard rentals.”

She lifted her wrist, finger hovering over the comm button. Ahsoka was coordinating a weapons transfer in Mos Eisley that was likely still underway. Plus, if this ended up being an easy fix she'd simply overlooked, Barriss would never live it down. _Maybe, I'll just try myself once more._

Three more unsuccessful repair jobs later, she finally caved to reality. However, before Barriss could call for help, she felt a tremor in her senses. Spinning in a circle, the woman scanned the area. Nothing seemed amiss, but she knew better. “I know you’re there. Show yourself.”

Someone shrouded by a brown, billowing robe, stepped from behind a nearby outcropping.

Edging hands toward her hidden sabers, she assessed the stranger warily. “Who are you? What do you want?”

The figure moved closer without answering.

Barriss lifted a palm. “Stay where you are and make your intentions known. I’d prefer to avoid unnecessary violence.”

The hood cocked as if evaluating her. Then, a wry voice from another life replied, “Are you suggesting that is no longer your method of choice, Barriss Offee?”

She stiffened. _Not possible._ Mouth opening and closing several times, she finally whispered, “Master Kenobi?”

“Call me Ben.” Then, his arms shot out.

Caught off-guard, Barriss flew backwards. She slammed into a jagged rock, and her head exploded in excruciating colors. Then, she slipped into darkness.

_______

Barriss groaned and opened her eyes. “W-what?” Glancing around, she saw sandstone walls of a spartan dwelling. Trying to sit up resulted in her head swarming and a realization. Ceasing her movements, Barriss spoke to the man she knew was there. “You put shock binders on my legs, too? Become a bit paranoid, have we?”

There was a grunt. “Strange accusation from the woman who trusts no one.”

Her fuzzy vision slowly adjusted to the muted lighting. Obi-Wan Kenobi was sitting in a chair a few feet away, still dressed in his worn robe, though the hood was now lowered. His features looked weary and windswept, much older than they should. Still, an inherent nobility remained as did the familiar spark of strength in his eyes. “That’s not who I am anymore. Apparently, you have changed, as well. Shoot first, ask questions later didn’t used to be the way Master Kenobi operated.”

Barriss thought she detected a small wince at the accusation. If so, his tone didn’t betray it. “Everything changes, Barriss Offee. Speaking of, call me Ben. Master Kenobi is long gone.”

She lifted bound hands to her aching head and prodded the fresh bandage. Closing her eyes, Barriss replied, “Perhaps. Though, essentials rarely do. Whatever you call yourself, I’m glad you are alive. We thought—the galaxy believes you're dead.” She mentally cringed at the lapse.

Of course, he noticed. “We?”

Chewing her lip, she finally opened her eyes to look at him. “I have a friend who worked for many years to ascertain the status of various Jedi. You had been marked as confirmed dead by Senator Organa’s eyewitness account.” _Bail, I hope you’re prepared for an angry Tano._

The lines of his face morphed into stony blankness. “And is this friend an Imperial?”

“Definitely not,” she answered amusedly. “I escaped their custody long ago. I don’t work for the Empire, if that’s what you’re asking. In fact, I’m part of the Rebellion.”

A keen gaze assessed her. “I should take your word on that?”

“I wouldn’t.”

“Why are you on Tatooine?”

“You’re not cleared for that information, Ben.”

He rubbed his forehead. “I can see this is going to be a long conversation.”

Barriss flashed a small grin. “It doesn’t have to be. You could simply accept I'm not going to tell you anything about my mission. Then, we could talk about more important matters.”

“Such as?”

“Why did you track and capture me? Where have you been? How did you survive the fall of the Order? Why are you on this backwater planet?”

“I would have thought a Jedi in hiding wouldn’t require explanation.”

Barriss shook her head. “Some of them, maybe. It’s not your style. You would have a reason for—” She halted, realization striking. “You’re here because of Luke.”

That got an immediate reaction. He leapt to his feet and stared her down. “What do you know about Luke?”

“It’s true, then. He is the son of Anakin Skywalker.” She struggled up to a sitting position. Propping herself against the wall behind the bed, Barriss stated, “You’re protecting him.”

His tone edged into quiet warning. “Answer my question.”

She shrugged. “Only what he told me today. Is that how you found me? Were you watching us? Or, did he run into you afterward? My speeder breaking down was fortuitous. Otherwise, you would have missed me.”

The man began pacing. “I felt a tremor in the Force and headed to Anchorhead. I arrived as he was pulling into Tosche Station. Luke was full of enthusiasm about the mysterious, beautiful woman with diamond tattoos he’d just dropped at her bike. The woman who'd appeared out of nowhere to save him and Biggs. The woman that might have known his father. A woman named _Barriss_.”

“I don’t know why I gave him my real name,” she mused. “I’m not usually so reckless. It was fate or instinct, perhaps. Something about him is… special.”

Obi-Wan halted and fixed on her. “Yes. He is.”

Barriss met his tense gaze. “I didn’t come here looking for him, if that's what worries you. I was on Rebellion business, when I witnessed an altercation between him and a group of thugs. I admired his tenacity and decided to help even the odds. When I heard his name, I became more interested. Though, I wasn’t sure if there was a connection. Until you showed up, that was the entire story.” She hesitated and then ventured, “Was he correct that his father is dead?”

Kenobi stiffened, before jerking an assent.

Her heart throbbed for the woman she would have to give that confirmation to later. “I’m sorry to hear that.”

There was an unsteady exhale. “I found out about Luke around the time Anakin… was lost. Then, Luke’s mother died in childbirth. My path seemed clear,” he ended with a pained expression.

_I wonder who she was?_ “I understand.”

Silence fell as he rapped knuckles on the table holding her confiscated supplies. “I see you have constructed new lightsabers. Where did you get the crystals?”

“One of Palpatine’s inquisitors hunted me down many years ago. I defeated him but was severely injured in the fight. I would have died, if the friend I mentioned hadn’t found me. She didn't want to leave his saber untended and took it with her. Later, I purified the corrupted crystals to build mine.”

His eyebrows shot up. “A fascinating story. I’m not sure I believe it, of course.”

"I don't blame you, given the last time you saw me I—” Barriss took a deep breath. “It still haunts me. I failed in every way possible. Delivering the message, betraying those I cared about, losing the same compassion I decried the Jedi for abandoning, and taking the lives of others in the process. I eventually came to realize I was as blind as the Order. Whether you accept that we were all lost back then, I don’t know. Either way, I don’t need forgiveness or understanding.” She pinned beseeching eyes on him. “However, I do need you to trust me for at least a couple of minutes. It’s urgent I update my friend on my status. If she suspects I’ve been captured by the Empire or the Hutts, the results could be disastrous.”

“Do you really think I’m going to allow you to contact this unknown handler and potentially activate a tracking signal or report my existence?”

“Are you planning to kill me? If not, I’ll have to leave at some point. It may be too late by then. I’m only asking that you allow me to stop her from risking her life in a pointless rescue mission. She doesn’t always act rationally when I’m in danger. Please, Master. It’s—” Barriss took a leap of faith. “My friend is… Ahsoka.”

His lips parted and then flattened. “You expect me to believe the woman you betrayed would infiltrate a heavily fortified location on the highly unsubstantiated assumption you’re in there? And you’re distressed enough about the possibility to practically beg me to stop it?”

She smiled wanly. “Yes.”

“Pardon me if I’m a bit doubtful.”

Barriss hissed a breath. “Fine. You’ll see. That comm will be blinking incessantly, if it hasn't already been doing so.”

His face fluctuated. “It has actually.” As if on cue, it chirped twice in quick succession. Obi-Wan stared at the flashing light and then grumbled, “I don’t know why I’m doing this.” He switched the device on, leaving their end muted.

Ahsoka’s subtly panicked voice crackled over it. “Fulcrum to Sokaat. Come in. Are you there? Please respond!”

Obi-Wan’s eyes widened and then softened. “Still unbroken,” he murmured. Turning back to her, Kenobi tossed the comm onto the bed. “Let’s see what trust means to you these days, Barriss Offee.”

She smiled gratefully and called it into her bound hands, before unmuting the line. “Ahsoka, I'm here. Don’t worry.”

There was a loud exhale. “Where are you?! Why haven’t you been answering? You were supposed to be back at the ship two hours ago!”

“I ran into some complications, but everything is fine. I need time to finish up. Oh, my bike broke down. So, I’ll call you back for a ride after I'm done, ok?”

An unmistakable growl came from the comm. “Absolutely not. I’m coming to get you now. Give me your location.”

Barriss winced. “I’m sorry I can’t do that. I’m dealing with an… unresolved issue. Please, Ahsoka. I need you to trust me.”

There was silence at the other end and then the distinct sound of teeth grinding. “Ok. Though, I won’t promise to not start scouring Tatooine if I don’t hear back from you _very_ soon.”

She smiled. “It's a deal.”

“Please, be careful.”

“Always,” Barriss replied with an impish lilt.

Ahsoka snorted. “Right.” She paused and then added softly, “I love you.”

Obi-Wan’s jaw dropped, and Barriss sighed. _Well, guess that had to come out at some point._ “Me too. Talk to you in a bit.” She shut off the comm and tossed it back to him. “Satisfied?”

The corners of his mouth twitched. “Oh, not even close. I have quite a few questions.”

She chuckled. “Of course, you do. Where do you want to start?”

“What happened to you after Palpatine seized power? How did you escape his control? When and how did you reunite with Ahsoka? Lastly, how your relationship turned romantic, if I read that exchange correctly. I believe your answers will tell me everything I need to know.”

Her muscles tensed. “It should. You’re asking for everything that made me who I am.” Barriss massaged the irritated skin on her bound wrists, throat constricting. “It won’t be an easy or short conversation.”

“Does that mean you aren’t going to tell me?”

She leaned back against the wall and whispered, “Let’s talk, Ben Kenobi.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Everyone ready for “the collection of half-truths and hyperbole known as Obi-Wan Kenobi”? 
> 
> Future Disclaimer: This is canon compliant as of Oct 2019. It is eminently possible TCW Season 7 or the new Obi-Wan series will contradict events. For example, we currently have no idea if Ahsoka ever found out Obi-Wan was alive or if he knows she is out there. We do know Ahsoka doesn't discover Anakin is Darth Vader until Rebels Season 2. Of course, we also have no clue on what happened to Barriss, either. Point is, I'm drawing within the current lines of what we've been given in an evolving canon. Also, I don't have a Lucasfilm story group in my back pocket. So, I could have missed something.
> 
> _Oh, and this is what weaving stories into canon does to people. --> "I haven't gone by the name Obi-Wan since, oh, before you were born." and "That's a name I've not heard in a long time." Well, that's seriously restrictive to me, Kenobi. Couldn't we say you're lying or something? I mean 'a long time' is a relative phrase, yes?_


	2. Trust

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Barriss and Obi-Wan hash out the past. When Ahsoka crashes onto the scene, Obi-Wan has choices to make.

“It’s impossible. You don’t understand what you’re asking of me. Luke is one thing. I’ll take your word on this unspecified destiny of his being critical to everyone’s future. And I agree the less who know, the safer he is. But concealing _you_ from Ahsoka? No. I won’t do it. I can’t withhold something that would restore a piece of her heart.”

“Her heart is what I’m concerned about.” Kenobi rubbed hands over his face and whispered, “Sometimes, truth brings only pain."

Barriss noted the scrunched shoulders and defeated posture. Whatever the man was holding back, it clearly haunted him. And he believed it would harm Ahsoka. Still, that didn't mean he could avoid giving the woman a measure of solace. "And sometimes it also brings closure."

"Not this time." He lifted a determined gaze to hers. "There are things I won't tell her.”

“Tell her _that_, then,” Barriss snapped. “You demand trust but won't give it to others?”

The man frowned. “You’re implying I don’t have faith in her. That’s never been true. In fact, that's exactly what she'll think when I refuse to share everything.” His expression tinged with regret. “Feeling untrusted can cause… damage.”

“That’s my point. You don’t trust her to know you’re alive, because she’ll think you don’t trust her. You don’t see the fallacy in that? Frankly, this is an irrelevant argument. I won't get the chance to reveal your existence. You’ve kept me here so long, I’m surprised she hasn’t stormed the place yet.”

His eyes narrowed. “How would she know where to do so? Did I miss a code in your earlier conversation? Do you have a tracking device implanted?”

“There are other ways to locate people, in case you’ve forgotten, _Master_. She has an additional advantage, as well. We have a Force bond. If she got close enough, Ahsoka could hone in on my presence. By now, she’ll have expanded her search far beyond Anchorhead. It’s only a matter of time.”

Obi-Wan stiffened. “A Force bond? That is dangerous.”

“According to the same Jedi code that led us all to destruction, yes,” she replied evenly. “I grant we couldn’t have handled it when we were younger and shrouded by darkness. Not without guidance the Order would have never given, anyway. If properly controlled, the bond brings balance and light. It is… completing. It’s a shame the Jedi chose to fear things that could bring fulfillment and higher understanding, merely because of misuse in rare cases. Forbidding attachments in general are a prime example.”

Gaze drifting to the small window above her head, he murmured, “Those rare cases you so easily dismiss can cause untold destruction.” His attention returned to her. “Is it worth the risk?”

“The risk is just as great in the reverse. The forced exclusion of my love for Ahsoka is one of the factors that led me down a path of destruction. It was the restoration of it that made me whole. Without her, I would have been lost forever.” Barriss shivered. “Genuine love is selfless. When someone is told that love is wrong, it causes confusion, insecurity, and misery. Those emotions can lead to anger, deceit, and selfishness. Encouraging discipline and control is wise. However, a philosophy of absolutes that forces people to be something other than who they are has inherent flaws.”

He stroked his chin for a few moments. “There may be something in what you say. Still, it concerns me. Your outcome is yet to be seen. What would happen if you lost Ahsoka?”

“That’s the wrong question. What would happen if I didn’t have Ahsoka at all? You already saw those results. That said, one cannot predict the circumstances of loss. What would happen if you lost Luke? Can you say for certain?”

Obi-Wan grimaced. “I suppose not. Though, I do recognize the potential for that outcome and would hope I could accept it.”

“As do I. I’ll eventually lose her or she me. That is not something my younger self could contemplate, much less accept. I can now, because there is no longer internal disharmony and shame. I'm not trying to be a perfect Jedi, while also unable to handle what the Jedi demand of me. I know who Barriss Offee is.” Her throat constricted. “The mistakes of the past are something she will never repeat.”

His eyes unfocused. “Yes, we all want to avoid repeating our mistakes. To do so, we have to understand them.” He jerked forward in his chair. “Do you believe trying to live by the code caused you to take such destructive actions?”

Barriss blinked at the sudden intensity. “I’m not sure I’d put it like that. I made my own choices. And there were many reasons. Are you asking why I did what I did?”

“In a sense. I’d like to know why you felt it was the best path, I suppose.”

“That’s a difficult question to answer. I felt afraid, confused, and alone. Pushing through that to follow the code—while the Council seemed to disregard it at will—twisted those emotions into bitterness and misery. Ahsoka's love and support tempered it for a shining moment. I had hope. Then, it was all ripped away. That’s when my last bit of control snapped.”

His brow furrowed. “It sounds like you’re saying becoming attached to Ahsoka _is_ what caused the problem.”

Barriss hissed a breath. “Then, you’re not listening. I was already living in darkness. Growing up amidst the violence and pain of war, pretending to be something I wasn’t, was too much. Ahsoka was the only light I had left. Yet, the Order would have forced me to give her up. Why? Because of fear not wisdom.” She added dryly, “As Master Yoda so often reminded us, fear leads to terrible places.”

“You're playing with words now, my dear. The code was designed to prevent exactly that.”

“Oh, please. Something based on fear cannot prevent it. The code is terrified Jedi won’t be able to control their attachments. Yet, instead of educating people in doing so, it leaves them vulnerable and inexperienced at doing exactly that. Emotional balance not emotional repression would have been a wiser approach.”

“Hmm… an interesting viewpoint. Let's say you're correct. It still doesn’t answer my question. The life of a Jedi isn’t for everyone. Why not simply leave the Order, if you were disillusioned and unhappy?”

“And do _what_? Where would I go? How would I live? It’s not as if I actively chose my life. You took me from a family I didn’t remember and programmed me to be one thing. Then, out of nowhere, I was supposed to leave the only home I’d ever known, fail my master’s faith in me, accept I wasn’t good enough to be what I thought was my purpose, and start a new life in an unfamiliar world? All because those I’d trusted decided violence was the way of a Jedi, while love was a path to the dark side.” Her voice cracked. “You don’t understand.”

Obi-Wan winced and said gently, “I’m not as blind as you think to those dilemmas. My point is the code, whether flawed or not, required certain things.” Deep pain crossed his worn features. “We all must one day decide whether being a Jedi is worth the sacrifice.”

She stared at him for a moment, before softening her tone. “I didn’t mean to suggest you haven’t had struggles, Master. It’s only that you are assuming I was capable of processing such a life-changing decision. The arguments I’m making now, I would never have understood then. Leaving the Order was a terrifying prospect. I was too young, too indoctrinated, too isolated to effectively make that choice. If I had been more experienced, and not beaten down by a constant battle inside and out, maybe I could have handled it better. As it was, it didn’t even seem like an option.”

The man squeezed his eyes shut. “I am sorry, Barriss. We should have done better for all of you.” His eyes snapped open and fixed on her with what looked like anxious hope. “Would it—did you consider discussing your feelings with your master? Luminara could have helped you navigate that choice. Would her support have made a difference?”

Barriss stared at the binders on her legs for a long moment, before dragging her gaze back up to his. “I don’t know. I never gave her the chance to try. I couldn’t bear to disappoint her by confessing my doubts. When I did hint at them, I simply got a reiteration of the code or an admonition to not let emotions control me.”

He nodded sadly. “You saw her as a perfect Jedi. Someone who would always fall back on the rules and couldn’t understand your pain.”

A dull heaviness settled in her chest. “I suppose. Really, asking anyone for guidance would have likely resulted in being lectured, censured, or dismissed. What if your apprentice had told you not only did he believe the Jedi Order was broken, but he also had fallen in love?”

Obi-Wan flinched and then curled trembling fingers over his knees. “You’re right. I would have counseled him to let go of his attachments, not question the council, and stay the course.” Meeting her eyes, he added, “Though, I hope I would have recognized the underlying torment over time and helped, even if it meant leaving the Order was the best course for him.”

She returned a melancholy smile. “I often wonder whether my master would have understood more than I believed, if I'd let her in.” A few tears escaped down her cheek. She lifted her bound hands and wiped them away. “I guess I’ll never know.”

The chair scraped as he crossed to the bed. Sitting beside her, Obi-Wan reached for the binders. “Let's take these off—”

Before he could continue, the front door blew inward and crashed to the floor. A blur rolled in, white lightsabers igniting in an attack posture. Then, she froze, eyes transfixed on Obi-Wan.

Ahsoka Tano had indeed found her.

_______

Ahsoka stared, hands shaking, as her mind processed the sight of Obi-Wan Kenobi. Joy rose in a heart that couldn’t quite believe what was in front of her. She shoved it away, strangely terrified of the feeling.

The man rose from the bed with a smile. “Hello, Ahsoka. You look well.”

“You’re alive,” she stated blankly.

“Indeed. I’m pleased to see you. Apparently, Barriss was accurate in her prediction of you storming my residence.”

Ahsoka jerked attention to the woman in question. She was propped awkwardly against a wall, arms and legs bound. Raising her sabers, Ahsoka demanded, “What’s going on?” Her eyes flicked back to Barriss, confused hurt rising. “Why didn’t you tell me to come here right away?”

Obi-Wan lifted placating hands. “It’s my fault, Ahsoka. I captured Barriss and then asked her not to reveal anything. Actually, if she hadn’t been so insistent, I wouldn’t have let her talk to you at all. Remember, I haven’t seen her since Palpatine took power. I had no idea who I might be dealing with. And I suppose I’ve become a bit paranoid these days.”

Barriss sent an apology across their bond, before saying, “I promise I would have called you. We just needed time to settle the past.”

Ahsoka blew out a breath and powered down her weapons. Striding to Barriss, she sat on the bed and examined her bandaged head. “Are you alright?”

“Yes, I told you the truth earlier. I'm fine. Of course, I didn’t expect it to be this long. We got caught up discussing things. I’m sorry I worried you.”

She ran fingers over Barriss’ cheek and murmured, “Ok.” Ahsoka twisted back to Kenobi with an accusatory glare. “The metal is rubbing her skin raw.”

Obi-Wan moved to the other side of Barriss and began typing a release code into the wrist binders. “Well, I was in the process of taking these off before you destroyed my front door,” he remarked wryly.

Ahsoka grunted. “It wouldn’t have been necessary, if you hadn’t forced her to be so vague over the comm.”

He chuckled. “Point taken.” Removing the leg restraints, Obi-Wan smiled. “I don’t know about you two, but I’m famished. How about something to eat?”

Unable to wrap her mind around such a normal suggestion, Ahsoka simply looked at him.

Barriss took her hand. “That sounds lovely. I haven’t eaten since I left Mos Eisley.”

Ahsoka clung to her fingers and continued to stare at the man that should be dead.

Obi-Wan gazed back for a few moments and then put a hand on her shoulder. “I’m going to make dinner. Perhaps, Barriss can bring you up to date on the day’s events. Then, we’ll chat more about everything else, alright?”

Letting out an unsteady breath, she nodded weakly.

He squeezed her shoulder. As the man strolled out of the room, he called, “Oh, and fix the door or we’ll have sand in our soup.”

_______

Ahsoka rubbed Barriss’ wrists absently as she listened to a recitation of the far too coincidental encounter with Obi-Wan and their subsequent interactions.

Barriss removed a hand from her grip and stroked Ahsoka’s cheek. “I told him about us.”

She licked her lips. “Oh. Uh, what did he say?”

“Actually, he reacted better than I anticipated. He doesn’t approve of the Force Bond, but that’s unsurprising, right?”

“I suppose.” Her jaw clenched. _What did you think he'd say, Tano? He was part of the same council that threw you to the wolves. Clearly, he never had faith in you. Why expect it now? _“It doesn’t matter. I don’t know why I care what he thinks.”

“Because, he’s important to you, Ahsoka. He was your grandmaster and a critical influence on your life. You don’t have to pretend otherwise.”

Swallowing tightness in her throat, she pressed their foreheads together. “Maybe. This is strange. I’m not sure how to feel.”

“I know. It’s alot to process at once. Let’s have dinner. Talk to him. Then, we’ll go from there. One step at a time, ok?”

A smile curved up, and Ahsoka brushed lips over hers. “I love you so much.”

_______

“Why are you here, _Ben_?”

Obi-Wan leaned back in his chair, both hands wrapped around a mug. “Are you asking why I’m hiding from the Empire?”

Pushing back her half-finished bowl of soup, Ahsoka locked an intense gaze on him. “Don't try that patented Kenobi doubletalk on me. I want to know why the man I never saw run from a fight to protect innocents and defend justice did just that. I also want to know why he chose this planet, specifically, to run away to.”

Barriss watched Obi-Wan’s conflicted face, wondering what approach he'd take. She intended to keep her part of the deal. Luke’s safety was paramount. Ahsoka’s position in the Rebellion and her status as a former Jedi only exacerbated the risk. If captured, Palpatine would expend every resource to strip her mind. Being the unwitting means of betraying Luke’s existence would destroy Ahsoka Tano, whether she survived the experience or not.

Making the objectively correct decision didn’t erase Barriss’ guilt, though. _This is probably how Obi-Wan feels everyday. Hiding away, not revealing himself to anyone he lost. Unable to make any new connections, forever isolated and apart. He can’t even defend the people around him from injustice. Not because he’s afraid for himself. It’s all for Luke. _She reassessed the man before her. The haggard lines, premature silver, and weary demeanor took on new significance.

The man finally let out a tired exhale. “I’m sorry, Ahsoka. I can’t answer your questions properly. I’m here for a purpose. I believe it may eventually lead to a restoration of peace and justice in the galaxy. Either way, it is my only purpose now.”

Ahsoka evaluated him for several moments. “And that purpose includes not sharing your existence with anyone? Even those who could help you achieve it? Or, may have found hope in simply knowing you were alive?”

He winced and then met her eyes. “Yes, I’m afraid it does.”

She crushed fingers into the edge in the table. “I see.” Her tone sharpened. “Then, why reveal yourself to Barriss?”

His shoulders hunched. “I can’t answer that question, either.”

Her jaw set. There was an awkward silence, until the woman turned to Barriss. “Tell me what’s going on.”

She tensed. “What?”

Ahsoka crossed her arms. “I can feel your anxiety and guilt, Barriss Offee. And the accidental meeting in the middle of nowhere is far too convenient. You’re holding something back. You both are.”

Obi-Wan fixed on Barriss with a pleading expression.

Pulling together her thoughts, she laid a hand on Ahsoka’s cheek. “You're right, but I can't add anything more. It’s not that you don’t deserve to know. It’s simply dangerous to you, Master Kenobi, his purpose, and everything we are fighting for. I stumbled into his mission, which is why he captured me. He’s trusting me to keep a secret he has sacrificed everything to protect. I won’t break that trust.”

“It isn’t you, Ahsoka,” Obi-Wan put in. “Sharing with anyone could endanger innocents. I had no choice with Barriss. Otherwise, we wouldn’t be having this conversation.”

Ahsoka jumped up from the table with a bitter smile. “Of course not. Trust has never been a strong suit of the Jedi, has it?” She paced around the room as old hurt flooded their bond.

“That’s the past,” Barriss reminded her. “This is the future.”

The woman halted and rubbed her arm. Gazing at nothing, she murmured, “Is it?”

Obi-Wan pushed himself up from the table and stood in front of her. “Ahsoka, I know I failed you all those years ago, but it wasn’t because I didn’t have faith in you. I disagreed with the Council’s decision. Still, I could have fought harder, made an effort as Anakin did to prove your innocence or as Plo did to protect you. Instead, I prioritized what I believed was the survival of the Order and my duty as a Jedi. It was one of many mistakes.”

Barriss opened her mouth to point out it had only been necessary due to her actions, but Ahsoka anticipated her. “This isn’t about you, Barriss.” Returning attention to Obi-Wan, she questioned, “And? Let’s say all that’s true. What’s changed?”

He scrubbed hands over his face. “Everything and nothing. I don’t know what the correct choice is anymore. I should never have believed I did. And I may be making another mistake with you right now. Or, perhaps, the mistake is already made or yet to come. All I can say is I’m trying my best, and I want you to be alright. You don’t have to give me unconditional faith again, but can you at least trust I’m doing what I _think_ is right for you as well as everyone else?”

She blew air into her cheeks and then released it. “Ok. That’s an answer I understand. If you need me to stay in the dark on this one, I guess I can handle it.” Her voice lowered. “And I never lost faith in you.”

Tension left his body, and he gripped her shoulder. “That’s because you are Ahsoka Tano. She’s overcome more than anyone should be expected to endure and grown into a woman of wisdom, compassion, and strength. The Jedi failed you, but that doesn’t change who you are.” He smiled fondly. “I thought I didn’t want to be found. Now, I’m simply happy you did. It may sound overly sentimental, but seeing the child I had a hand in nurturing fulfill their potential is a gift nearly too overwhelming for words. It’s important to me that you know I am _extremely_ proud of you, Ahsoka.”

Her face tightened, eyes blinking rapidly. Then, she threw arms around his neck and whispered, “Thank you… Master.”

Contentment flowed into the previously weary eyes as he returned the embrace. “I should be thanking you, my dear. Hope in a better future can often feel like an intangible dream.” His voice resonated with quiet conviction. “But not today.”

_______

“Did you… see Anakin die?”

Obi-Wan jerked, and the steaming after-dinner caf he was pouring spewed onto the side table.

“Sorry!” Ahsoka grabbed a rag to help clean up the mess. “Didn’t mean to spring that on you. It’s just early Imperial propaganda claimed he died defending Palpatine from allegedly traitorous Jedi.” Her eyes flashed. “As if my master would _ever_ side with evil incarnate. Rebel intel sources reported he was killed protecting younglings in the Temple, which sounded more likely. Then, a few years ago, I found buried Imperial records saying his body was recovered from Mustafar after a confrontation involving a wide range of conflicting people—Separatist leaders, clone squads, an unknown Sith Lord, even you! I mean the outcome is always him—well, you never know, right?”

Kenobi crossed to a chair and sagged into it. He rubbed whitening fingers over his forehead. Ahsoka jerkily added sweetner to her caf, shooting glances his direction.

Barriss settled onto Obi-Wan’s couch and sipped her glass of Jawa juice. She couldn’t decide which answer Ahsoka needed to hear. Eyewitness testimony would take away her last shred of hope. She could finally put her master to rest. The lack of first-hand knowledge would leave her in the same state of near certainty but leave the possibility of a miracle. Both results were a different kind of painful.

After a full minute of heavy silence, Obi-Wan released a long exhale. “I’m sorry, Ahsoka. The reports may vary, but the essential outcome is accurate.”

She dropped beside Barriss, intently blowing on her caf. “Do you know for sure, though?”

“I can’t tell you how it happened,” he answered hoarsely, “but I saw the aftermath. So, yes, I can confirm the end result. Anakin Skywalker is… gone.”

_Strange._ Barriss circled a finger over the lip of her glass. His phrasing was slightly off as if he was talking around something. _What?_

Obi-Wan looked back up. “There’s nothing more you can do for your master. Holding on will only bring more pain. Please, let him go.”

She stared vacantly at the mug in her hands. “Right. That’s what I—yeah.”

Analysis thrown to the wayside, Barriss took the caf from Ahsoka’s hand. She set it on the table and knelt in front of her. “Hey. What would Anakin want you to do now?”

The woman slowly focused on her, chin quaking. Leaning their foreheads together, she was silent. Barriss stroked her cheek and waited.

Finally, Ahsoka rasped, “He’d want me to keep fighting.” Lifting her head, she nodded crisply. “Yes, never give up.”

Smiling, Barriss brushed lips over hers and then shifted back onto the couch. Interweaving fingers in Ahsoka’s, she laid against the woman’s shoulder, feeling it relax beneath her.

Kenobi was watching them with an evaluative expression. “You know, Barriss wasn’t wrong. I do believe you two _are_ stronger together.”

Ahsoka’s mouth parted and then curved into a grin. “No argument here.”

He chuckled and then sobered. “Ahsoka, I hope you don’t doubt Anakin’s confidence in you. It never wavered. Your master always believed in you, and you’ve certainly justified that faith.”

Body stiffening, she closed her eyes for several seconds. A smile edged up, and her eyes flipped open. “Thanks.” Grabbing her caf, she sipped it and then yelped. “Force! Do you boil this stuff in both Tatooine suns, Master?”

He laughed and took a dramatic swig from his own mug. Swirling it around with a faux contemplative expression, he swallowed and remarked, “Seems like the perfect state of hotness to me.”

Ahsoka squinted at him and tried hers again. Frantically swallowing, she blew out short breaths. “Oo-ha-haaaht!”

Barriss grinned. “Ahsoka Tano, Master of Caf has met her match. This will be a day long remembered.” She added archly, “We’re talking _years._”

A glare shot back at her, before Ahsoka asked Obi-Wan, “Are you aware of any other survivors? Assuming they aren’t on a mysterious, undisclosed mission like _some_ people, we might be able to help them.”

He tapped fingers on his knee. “There is one. However, he needs no assistance.”

“And that person is?” Ahsoka prompted. “Or, is me knowing going to cause the galaxy to implode?”

“No, it’s merely that I can’t give you details. It’s also imperative you don’t search for him. So, I'm not sure knowing would provide any benefit or comfort.”

She put a hand over her heart. “Word of honor, I shall not scour the galaxy for said person.”

Despite the light tone, Barriss could feel Ahsoka’s agitation and put in, “I think we were simply hoping we’re not the only three out there.” She deliberately didn’t mention the newly discovered Kanan Jarrus to remind Ahsoka she wasn’t exactly being forthcoming with other’s secrets, either.

The message wasn’t lost, and Ahsoka gave her a wan smile. “It would be nice to have some happy news for once is all. Of course, I didn’t ever expect to see you again. Bail certainly has some explaining to do,” she ended darkly.

Obi-Wan chuckled. “Don’t be too hard on him. It was my request. And I imagine he wouldn’t see it as his secret to reveal to anyone, even you.”

She crossed her arms. “Hmph.”

The man rapped fingernails along his mug and then abruptly announced, “Yoda lives.”

Both women’s jaws hit the floor. A host of emotions played across Ahsoka’s face, before her eyes blazed. “Let me get this straight. The greatest Jedi Master of all time is in parts unknown, while innocents suffer and the rest of us fight a Sith Lord. Am I understanding this correctly?”

Kenobi sighed. “You see? Getting answers doesn’t always help.”

Barriss admonished gently, “I’m sure he has a reason.”

Ahsoka hissed a breath. “I’ll have to believe that, I suppose. Because the alternative is unthinkable to me. It better be a damn good reason.” Sinking back into the couch, she added in a calmer tone, “Can you share how he survived?”

“When Palpatine ordered the Jedi’s destruction, Yoda was actually on Kashyyyk and—”

“With Master Luminara?” Barriss interjected, glass trembling in her hand. “Do you know if—if she…?”

Obi-Wan grimaced. “I’m sorry, Barriss. I don’t know what happened to Luminara. Neither did Yoda. She was apparently on a different part of the planet at the time.”

She withered and set her drink on the table. “Oh. That makes sense.”

Ahsoka rubbed a thumb over their interlocked fingers. “Don’t give up.”

Giving a strained smile, Barriss squeezed back. “Sorry, I interrupted. So, how did Yoda escape? And you? When did you find each other?”

“He fought off attacking clones with the help of the Wookiees, who then hid him. After realizing what was happening, Bail went in search of survivors and rescued him. I evaded my troops on Utapau and met up with them both. We decided to return to Coruscant and recalibrate the beacon to warn remaining Jedi away.” He paused, before adding, “Then, I left to track Palpatine’s apprentice, who had led the attack on the Temple. Meanwhile, Yoda confronted the newly proclaimed Emperor. We were both… unsuccessful.”

Ahsoka gaped. “Palpatine bested Yoda in combat?”

“Yes. He barely survived. I’ve never seen Master Yoda looking so…” Obi-Wan closed his eyes. “... defeated. He blamed himself. The Sith had spent a thousand years advancing and the Jedi had stagnated.” His eyes reopened and fixed on Barriss. “Tools of the dark side as someone once insisted. Arrogant and blind.”

Staring down at her feet, Barriss replied, “So was she at the time.”

Ahsoka cleared her throat. “Yet, not all is lost. For instance, I’ve recently discovered a padawan that survived the purge. So, there is at least one more. And he is training an apprentice. The Jedi will go on. Maybe in a new way, and taking another form, but their legacy will endure.”

He smiled softly. “As it should be. All life transforms into the Force and back again. Each generation springing anew and building on the one before. It is a lesson the Order forgot. However, it is something I hope those that came after us, including the two people in front of me will embrace.”

Returning a broad grin, Ahsoka winked. “Already on it, Master.”

Obi-Wan laughed. “Excellent. Now, if we're done dwelling, anyone interested in a hand of Repo? It’s been ages since I’ve had any Force users to challenge.”

Barriss lit up. “Yes, please. Ahsoka will never play with me.”

The woman in question groaned. “Do you know what you’ve done? She’ll crow about her victory for a month!”

Obi-Wan harrumphed. “Ye of little faith. How do you know I won’t clean you both out?”

Ahsoka gave him a highly dubious look. “Even _I’ve_ beaten you at Repo.”

“Perhaps, my skills have advanced in my elder years,” he replied airily.

Barriss rubbed her hands together. “Enough talk, people. There’s a top of the line blender I’m a few credits short of purchasing.”

He raised eyebrows at Ahsoka, who answered the unspoken question, “Oh, she’s perfectly serious. Don’t get between Barriss and a kitchen appliance.”

“I don’t hear you complaining when you’re enjoying the benefits of my kitchen,” Barriss retorted.

Obi-Wan snorted. “Oh my. If I had known this awaited me, I would have accidentally been discovered years ago.”

Both women stuck tongues out at him. Then, all three dissolved into laughter.

As they played, both past and future fell away. The happy voices and snarky banter continued until early morning dawn broke through the windows. There was only this moment. And it was beautiful.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Obi-Wan Kenobi's House of Answers, half-truths are our specialty. Get your own truth on sale today! 1 in 10 lucky customers will also receive an occasional honest answer and some validation. 
> 
> _Fine Print:_ Answers are not guaranteed to be completely accurate and are based solely on your own the point of view. Kenobi's House of Answers assumes no liability for irrationally noble or stupidly loyal acts as a result of said truth. Examples include but are not limited to sacrificing yourself in a doomed attempt to save your evil master. You assume all risks attendant upon answers received. Oh, nevermind, how about we just don't tell you?


	3. Cold Truth

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> An interrupted Imperial broadcast sends Barriss on a mission to make things right. Meanwhile, Ahsoka deals with the consequences.

A buzzing transmission interrupted the Imperial news broadcast. “Citizens, this is Senator-in-exile Gall Trayvis. I bring more news the Empire doesn't want you to hear. One of the Republic's greatest peacekeepers, Jedi Master Luminara Unduli, is alive.”

Barriss jerked up from her datapad, eyes fixed on the holorecording of her old master in an orange prison jumpsuit, being escorted by stormtroopers.

“She has been imprisoned unlawfully somewhere in the Stygeon system. As citizens, we demand the Emperor produce Master Unduli and grant her a fair trial before the entire Sen—”

There was a screech and then the Imperial broadcast continued like nothing had happened. Barriss gripped the table, entire body shaking. _Not possible._ But… _it could be._

The image of Luminara in custody was the same one from Ahsoka’s files. It might have been discovered and interpreted to be a recent event. Whether Trayvis’ intel on her continued imprisonment was accurate or not was unknown. Still, it was the first time a location had been mentioned. _Stygeon._ That meant the Spire.

It could also be a trap—the Empire leaking an old holorecording as bait for hidden Jedi. _Likely._ Barriss pushed her shoulders back. _I don’t care._

Jumping up, she sprinted to the cockpit of their newly acquired XS freighter. Ahsoka was meeting with a critical operative somewhere on this unpleasant, rain-soaked planet. She wasn’t due back until tonight. _I can’t wait._ Barriss activated the comm. “Sokaat to Fulcrum. Come in.”

There was no response. _Please, don’t be out of range._ Nerves crackling, she tried again. “Fulcrum, please respond.” After four more failed attempts, Barriss slammed fists onto the console. “Dammit, Ahsoka. I need you!”

She felt tears spattering her cheeks but ignored them. Barriss loaded the schematics of the Spire prison and analyzed the defenses. _It’s nearly impregnable. Nearly._ There was an upper-level landing platform that looked promising. _Too promising._ It smacked of an Imperial trap. _But you’re going to do it anyway, aren’t you? Yes. I am._ The tears stopped.

Straightening in her seat, Barriss calculated an ETA to Stygeon and her stomach dropped. This was not going to be a quick trip and speed was imperative. If Luminara was actually there, she wouldn’t be for much longer. Once realizing the location had been made public, the Empire would transfer her to a new facility.

_What about Ahsoka?_ The Togruta would be extremely wary and want to gather more intel from other sources first. Besides, if it was a ruse, Barriss wanted the woman she loved nowhere near it. _I can’t risk her life for my issues._ At the same time, running off without explanation and potentially dying in the process… She shivered. _Oh, Soka. I don’t know what the right decision is._

Barriss tugged hands through her hair. _No time for your analytical paralysis, Offee. Choose._ Focusing her mind, she searched for the correct path. As the cockpit faded away, the past swirled in hues of red, yellow, and gray.

_There was a warm smile as Luminara completed the final diamond tattoo and rubbed a thumb over it. Barriss fixed adoring eyes on her new master, determined to prove herself worthy of being chosen… _

_Luminara put a restraining hand on her arm with an expression Barriss swore looked downright devious. She closed her mouth in confusion, leaving the warning unsaid. Luminara placed elbows on the table and rested her chin on interlocked fingers, simply watching Master Kenobi sip the bowl of soup he’d mistaken for his own. There was a choked gasp when fire pepper broth hit his throat. Skin molting five shades of red, he waved frantically in front of his gaping mouth as if dispelling invisible smoke. Her master began laughing at a level Barriss had never witnessed. He shot murderous glares between huffs, before finally succumbing to laughter himself. Barriss gaped as two Jedi Masters tittered like younglings… _

Another image appeared and all levity died. _Standing amidst the broken bodies of her clone squad, Barriss’ soul crushed under the weight of guilt and anger. Her men had trusted her, and she had led them to their deaths. “They deserved better,” she rasped. Luminara gripped her shoulder, and there was a momentary relief from the encroaching darkness… _

_Barriss demonstrated her Form III technique to Grand Master Yoda. He hummed in approval and asked her a series of questions on Jedi philosophy. His face crinkled as he pronounced that she would be a wise, skilled, and compassionate Jedi Knight one day. Luminara’s eyes shined with pride, sending unreal joy ricocheting through Barriss’ heart… _

Then, terrible reality ripped the moment apart._ A sorrowful face gazed at her from the other side of a security field. “Why, Barriss? How did I fail you?”_

Her lungs pounded against aching ribs, and she heaved breaths. “Not—not your fault. I f-failed you.”

Beating the memories back, Barriss steadied herself. The ship finally came back into focus. _You already know the answer._ She switched on the cockpit recorder. “I’m headed to Stygeon Prime…”

Finishing her message, the woman took a moment to run trembling fingers over Ahsoka’s seat. “I’m sorry. I have to do this.” Wiping wet cheeks, she hurried to the docking port and climbed into their auxiliary fighter.

Then, Barriss Offee set a course for her last chance to make things right.

_______

There was no welcome home kiss, no delicious aroma of dinner cooking, no update on ongoing operations, and no rumbling of engines warming up for departure. Ahsoka hadn’t realized how used to those things she had become, until their absence. “Barriss?”

Peeking into the kitchen, a knot formed in her stomach. It was immaculate and empty. Her progressively unsuccessful search of the ship turned into a near run. “Barriss! Answer me!” Reaching the cockpit, she spotted a blinking light and jammed the button.

A far too clinical voice rang from the recording, “I’m headed to Stygeon Prime. A transmission from Trayvis indicated Luminara is potentially being held there. I don’t know when you’ll be back and time is of the essence, so I’m taking the fighter…”

Ahsoka braced herself on the back of a seat as vertigo attacked. _No. What are you thinking?! You can’t infiltrate the Spire alone. Trayvis’ intel is not even reliable. It’s probably a trap. You know better than this, Offee!_ Her breathing became fast and shallow.

There was a long pause, before Barriss continued, “I know what you’re thinking and you’re right. Still, I have to try.” Her voice took on a pleading edge. “Please, don’t come after me. I can’t handle you risking your life because of my impulsiveness. I’ll be back soon, and you can lecture me at length, ok?” Barriss barked a short laugh. She took several deep breaths and then whispered, “I love you so much, Ahsoka Tano. Don’t forget. No matter how this turns out, I’m still yours. Forever.”

The recording cut off, and the cockpit spun around her. Ahsoka collapsed into the pilot’s seat to keep from falling. “No, no, no… tell me this isn’t happening.” Closing her eyes, she tried to focus. Finally, the chaos calmed enough to form coherent thoughts.

_‘Don’t come after me.’_ She growled. “Really, Offee? Now, I know you’ve lost it. Have you forgotten who you’re talking to?”

Flipping her eyes open, Ahsoka charted the fastest path to the woman she loved.

_______

_“Yes, Master. I will review and annotate it immediately. Would you like a written report of the major points?”_

_Luminara sighed. “Barriss, this is not a text to be studied. It’s a story to be enjoyed.”_

_She blinked and then scanned the object in her hands. “It’s a… novel?!”_

_The woman quirked an eyebrow. “What are you trying to imply about my favorite book?”_

_Barriss looked askance at her but then lowered her eyes. “Nothing, Master.”_

_A wry voice commented, “Leisure activities aren’t a path to the dark side, Padawan. Wisdom often comes from unexpected places.”_

_“I suppose,” Barriss replied doubtfully. Dragging her gaze back to Luminara, she bit her lip. “I’m just not sure how reading something called ‘Beach of Stars’ will make me a better Jedi.”_

_One corner of her master’s mouth edged up. “Barriss, you are exceptionally disciplined and dedicated. However, too much intensity can lead to imbalance. All of us must sometimes unwind our minds and rejuvenate our spirits. You may not enjoy this form of relaxation. I find it fulfilling is all.”_

_“You like reading…” She wrinkled her nose. “... made-up stories? There doesn’t appear to be educational value or purpose to spending time on such an activity.”_

_Luminara flicked eyes skyward. “How do you know until you try it? In any case, that’s not exactly the point of reading fiction. Give it a chance. You might be surprised.”_

_Resigning herself to her fate, Barriss mumbled, “Yes, Master. I shall endeavor to… enjoy myself.”_

_The woman chuckled. “Alright, I’ll take it.” _

_Still unable to reconcile her master’s interest in a seemingly meaningless task, Barriss ventured, “You said this book was one of your favorites. Why?”_

_“Hmm, interesting question. It’s well-written and engaging. Overall, though, I'd say I enjoy the message behind it.” Placing the back of her hand on Barriss’ cheek, she smiled. “Our journey through life is an ever-changing landscape, shaped by the Force yet unique to each of us. I find this particular exploration of that to be inspiring, I suppose.”_

_Barriss tried not to show her pleasure at the affectionate gesture, but her heart melted into content happiness. Being touched at all was a rare gift, by her master even more so. _

_Luminara’s cerulean eyes sparkled with warmth. “Remember, my Padawan, your future is only a story yet to be told. Make it a good one.”_

Barriss jerked out of her reverie as the fighter dropped out of hyperspace. She sublit through the system, skirting along the edges to avoid patrols.

As she reached Stygeon Prime, her mind floated into the past once more. Barriss gazed down at the dense clouds obscuring an unknown destiny and quoted softly, “I am cast upon the winds of space and time, like a planetesimal spun eternally between suns.” Then, she dove toward the Spire.

_______

A shrill alert rang out in the cockpit. Ahsoka jumped and put down the book she was forcing herself to read. Checking the ETA to Stygeon, she rubbed her arm. _There’s nothing you can do for Barriss right now. Might as well do your job._

Taking a deep breath, she activated the vocoder and answered calmly, “This is Fulcrum.”

“This is Spectre Two. We have critical intel.”

She raised eyebrows. “Acknowledged. Go ahead.”

Hera Syndulla continued quickly, “Earlier today we attempted a rescue mission of Jedi Master Luminara Unduli from the Spire, based on information leaked from Gall Trayvis.”

Ahsoka dug fingernails into her palms. “Attempted?”

“We successfully infiltrated. However, Master Unduli died long ago.”

Squeezing her eyes shut, Ahsoka took a moment to fight off the grief. _It always seems to end this way._ “Understood.”

“I don’t really grasp how it works, but Spectre One indicated her bones have been preserved. This apparently kept her essence intact in order to lure Jedi to their deaths. An Imperial operative confronted our team and indicated the ploy has been successful in the past. We wanted to get the word out to prevent it ever being so again.”

Ahsoka swallowed the painful knot swelling in her throat. “A wise precaution. I will ensure all cells are informed. We can also distribute an alert through rebel networks.”

Hera gave a relieved exhale. “Good.”

“D-did you… encounter any other good Samaritans during your mission?

“No,” came the surprised response. “Only a heavy Imperial presence, including a Force-wielder calling himself the Inquisitor.”

Ahsoka tensed. “Any useful details on him?”

“Spectre One would have to provide a description. However, he was powerful and skilled. We barely escaped, and only then with a bit of luck. I gather he also had a rather impressive spinning lightsaber,” she ended in the tone of someone who'd heard that particular fact too many times.

Clenching and unclenching her fingers, she replied vacantly, “I see.”

“Fulcrum, is everything ok? You sound… off.”

Ahsoka grimaced and tried to calm the emotions. “I’m concerned others may have already embarked on the same mission. Senator Trayvis reached a wider audience than I expected.”

“Yes,” Hera murmured. “I wonder…”

Her emotions pitched near her control limits. “I appreciate the timely information. I'm signing off to take immediate action. Stay safe. Fulcrum out.” Not even waiting for a response, Ahsoka slapped a hand at the comm to close the line.

Pressing palms into the console, she sucked in erratic breaths. “Get it together, Tano. This ship can’t go any faster. Do what you promised Hera. Save anyone else you can. Then, it’ll be time to save the woman you love.”

That made the terror recede, and her seizing muscles relaxed. Setting up a wide frequency alert signal, Fulcrum got to work.

_______

Barriss examined the explosive scorching to the lift. Someone clearly had the same idea as her. _But what happened to them?_ The damage was fresh, perhaps only a few hours old.

Following Luminara’s off-kilter presence, she reached an isolation cell. There were no guards. _Strange._

Putting a hand to the door, Barriss reached out with the Force. _Yes, she’s in there. I can feel it._ Yet, her aura still felt… wrong. It was Luminara, but it wasn’t. _I don’t understand._ Stepping back, she waved a hand across the lock and the door slid open.

Luminara Unduli sat on a bench, head in her hands. She looked up as Barriss entered with mournful eyes.

Her vague sense of wrongness solidified, and horrible realization edged into her desperate mind. _No! It’s not true. I won’t give up hope._ “Master? It’s me. I came to rescue you.”

The woman rose and stood in front of Barriss silently.

Unable to fight reality any longer, she croaked, “You’re not really here anymore, are you?”

One corner of Luminara’s mouth upturned into a dismissive sneer. Turning away, she calmly walked to the far wall, where a sarcophagus materialized. Luminara stepped back, merging into the metal coffin. Cerulean blue eyes locked on Barriss through the square pane of glass framing her face. Anguished acceptance pierced the air between them. Then, her head dropped, blue energy crackling her body into a pained visage of mummified bones.

“No!” Barriss stumbled over to the death chamber and slammed fists against it. Her heart shattered as the truth she’d tried to deny crashed over everything. A remnant of Luminara’s essence had been trapped here, preserved in eternal torment. Barriss choked on brittle breaths. Pressing her trembling forehead to the glass, she gazed at her long-dead master. “I’m so sorry. I’ve failed you in every way possible.”

A sudden whoosh sounded behind her, and she whirled around.

“Ah, at long last. Welcome, Barriss Offee. I am the Grand Inquisitor.” The door slid shut, pressure locking itself as an imposing figure stepped into the cell. “My apologies for keeping you waiting. We’re still cleaning up after the last Jedi incursion.”

She backed against Luminara’s sarcophagus and activated her lightsabers, assessing the gaunt Pau'an male. He was dressed in a gray bodysuit, covered by black shoulder and neck armor. An inquisitorial-style saber ignited in his hand. It was more precise, less flamboyant, and better refined than others she’d seen. Added to the calm arrogance and snide politeness, it told her this inquisitor was a different animal altogether. _Break down later, Offee._ Barriss spun her matching sabers into a ready stance. “The _Grand_ Inquisitor? Does that mean you make the rousing speeches at Inquisitorius rallies?”

His lips drew back, revealing spindled, fang-like teeth. “Excellent. I had hoped our reunion would not disappoint.”

_Reunion?_ Scanning for an escape strategy, Barriss kept talking, “I didn’t know slaves had life goals.”

Ignoring the barb, the man mused, “The Force works in mysterious ways, does it not? The last time we saw each other, I was the one holding a yellow-bladed saber and attempting to save already doomed Jedi.”

Barriss froze. “You were a temple guard.”

“Before you planted the seed of truth, yes. Your words at the trial of Ahsoka Tano were an inspiration to me. Perhaps it will comfort you to know your message didn’t fall on completely deaf ears.” A predatory grin spread across his pale visage, making his scarlet face markings pop in stark contrast. “You also have the distinction of being the only former Jedi on our rolls that is to be executed immediately upon capture.”

“Not even an interrogation? Or, more pointless torture? You’d think I’d done enough to warrant at least a chance to turn to the dark side.”

“Yes, it is unfortunate. As I said, my respect for you is high.” He ignited his second blade but didn’t make any threatening moves.

“Not _that_ high, apparently,” she replied dryly. Barriss coiled herself into a defensive posture. “I suppose previous disloyal service to a Sith Lord doesn’t mean what it used to.”

“Oh, it isn’t your duplicity while in the Emperor's custody. If anything, that merely illustrates what a valuable asset you would be to my operation. I am still trying to break the inadequate whelps you trained of their flawed techniques. You were quite thorough. Only last week, I had to remove a hand to stop one from dropping it during his feints.”

Barriss smirked. “Life is tough as a servant of evil, huh?”

His expression turned shrewd. “Indeed, it was. Another thing we are of the same mind on. As you once so eloquently pointed out, the Jedi were villains.”

Her stomach roiled at her own warped words thrown back at her.

“Though, none of this is the reason for your fate. It is simply that my master finds you…” He paused in mock delicacy. “... distasteful.”

Analyzing the man’s stance and bearing, she calculated the most effective offensive style and quipped, “Can’t please everyone.”

He motioned his saber toward Luminara’s coffin. “You know, I stood in this very spot as she walked willingly into death. Master Luminara had no idea of the service she was rendering by accepting her fate, of course. Still, it disgusted me. Jedi,” he scoffed, “weak fools all.”

“_You_ disgust me,” Barriss spat. “It takes much more strength to accept death than to betray those you swore to protect, merely to keep your own pathetic existence. You are the definition of weakness.”

Yellow flared in his eyes. “It’s fitting that she should be the instrument of your downfall. When I chose her for this glorious purpose, the irony was not lost on me. If it wasn’t for you, I might never have seen the truth. And Luminara Unduli wouldn’t be preserved for all eternity as a lure to traitors of Empire.” His thin lips twisted in malevolent glee. “Tell me. Do you think your master would be proud?”

Barriss’ chest caved as the words cleaved her heart, rending it apart. She fixed an agonized gaze on the face forever frozen in suffering as the woman’s clouded essence wafted through the currents. _No._ Her knees quaked, slow horror creeping into every muscle.

It was evidently the moment her opponent had been awaiting. He lunged forward, slashing at her head.

Unprepared and off-balance, she barely got her sabers up in time. Barriss ducked under another incoming blow and rolled to the middle of the cell, focus wavering between calm and chaos.

His attacks were relentless, and she countered mechanically. _It’s my fault. She suffered because of me, in turn causing others to suffer._ Every movement lacerated her soul, and Barriss’ body became sluggish and heavy.

A red blade slipped through her defenses. She deflected it away from her chest but not far enough. It sliced through flesh and bone, tearing the length of her forearm open and severing nerves. Barriss screamed as the saber dropped from her now dead hand.

Staggering back against the far wall, she raised her remaining weapon to stop a follow-up attack. She continued to numbly block blow after blow, not bothering to parry. Even the pain stopped registering. Her mind slipped further and further away from reality. _Too late. It's too late for anything._

As her muscles finally died in a cascading paralysis, Barriss collapsed, saber clattering to the floor.

The inquisitor sneered. “As weak as your master. How disappointing.” Luminara’s death mask edged into view as he shifted positions for a kill strike.

She gazed at her master desperately, wishing her last moments had meant something. A warm voice whispered through the currents. _‘Let go of what was, my Padawan. Your future is yet to be told. You can still make it a good one.’_

_ It’s never too late. _ Everything snapped, and Barriss exploded, sending the inquisitor flying backwards. Calling her lost weapon to her hand, she went on the offensive. Mind, soul, and body aligned in harmony. The man stumbled as her lightning quick attacks struck in unrelenting succession. Taking the opening, she snagged his saber’s ringed shaft assembly with the tip of her blade and then flung him against the opposite wall. 

Thumbing a switch, he shunted power away from the damaged section of his emitter, leaving a single, sputtering blade. They circled each other, shades of red and yellow illuminating muted gray.

Barriss saw fear flicker in his eyes. “It will not end well for you. If you’d truly understood my message, you would know that serving darkness is a failing proposition. As I once so eloquently pointed out, it's only a matter of time.”

He snarled and leapt forward. She crashed her saber into his, locking their blades. His face twisted as he strained to break free.

Holding her weapon steady, she pinpointed on the sparking wires protruding from his cracked hilt. Her eyes fluttered closed as the Force flowed through her entire being. His unstable blade fizzled and then died.

There was a gasp. “No.” The inquisitor threw out a hand, knocking her back a few steps.

Barriss recovered instantly, weaving her saber with an ethereal smile. “Are you ready for actual truth, _Grand_ Inquisitor?”

Eyes darting around, he edged toward the door. Feinting a Force push, the man instead punched a button on his wrist control. The cell door slid open, and he scrambled through it.

She began to give chase, but then jerked to a halt at the top of the steps. _Finish what you came here for, Offee._

Slicing the panel to lock the door in an open position, she limped to the sarcophagus in grim determination. Luminara needed her, and for once Barriss Offee would live up to that faith. “Don’t worry, Master. Your suffering will no longer lead to more.”

Barriss raised her lightsaber over the woman who’d been the closest thing she’d had to a mother. Then, she slashed a small rectangle out of the death trap. It hissed as long compressed air escaped.

Returning the weapon to her belt, she called its sister from the floor. Removing a panel from the hilt assembly, she deactivated the protective shield around the kyber crystal and nicked the surrounding wires. Reverently laying the saber to rest with the bones of her master, Barriss gazed at Luminara one last time. She pressed whitening fingers against the glass pane, tears burning into her eyes and throat. “I love you.”

Dragging herself from the cell, Barriss stood in the doorway. She stretched out with her feelings and locked onto the delicately balanced crystal now entombed with Luminara. Lifting a trembling hand, she squeezed it into a hard fist. The crystal destabilized with a high-pitched, escalating whine. A sobbing cry escaped her lips, and she ran.

Crossing just beyond the blast radius, Barriss braced herself against a vertical support beam. She dropped her head, pictured the woman that was, and waited.

Five seconds later, an explosion reverberated down quiet corridors, shaking the foundations of everything. Blasting heat singed her skin, and cleansing fire licked the nearby walls. Her master’s lingering presence faded away as the last remnants of Luminara Unduli burned to ashes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh, Barriss.  
Oh, Luminara.  
Oh, Ahsoka.  
Force, there's alot of pain in this chapter.


	4. Future Unwritten

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Barriss and Ahsoka deal with the consequences of opening old wounds.

Sliding through a hole in the defensive perimeter, Ahsoka scanned the Spire. There were burnt-out TIE fighters and damage from explosive charges scattered across a lower platform. _Yep, the Spectres have definitely been here._

She would have laughed, if her mind hadn’t been in a state of barely controlled panic. _Ok, did Barriss arrive before or after them? Could she still be infiltrating?_

Hiding her freighter among a group of soaring Tibidee, Ahsoka circled the prison and attempted to pinpoint Barriss. Fear, anger, and confusion from a multitude of overlapping people crowded the underlying currents, making locating the woman’s presence near impossible. _Focus harder, Tano!_

Honing in on a massive conglomeration of the interweaving emotions, her mind sifted through it for the one she knew so well. _There. _Bringing up a visual of the specific section, she zoomed in. Her adrenaline kicked into overdrive.

Barriss was crouched on a landing platform, in front of what remained of their fighter—which was to say a pile of smoldering metal. The woman was deflecting blaster bolts from a large group of stormtroopers one-handed. Her opposite arm hung limply at her side. A darkly clad figure holding an erratic red blade was observing from the platform door, apparently in no hurry to end the stand-off.

_Well, I will._ Ahsoka punched her thrusters and shot into place over the altercation. Rotating in place, she laid down a circular barrage of fire at the white helmets surrounding the Mirialan.

They scattered, and Barriss gaped up at the cockpit window as shock hit their bond. It was followed in quick succession by relief, annoyance, and adoration.

Ahsoka grinned and hit the loading bay ramp release. She glanced back out the window. “Seriously?!”

The Inquisitor had charged Barriss’ position and was forcing her away from the ship. Ahsoka imprinted a mental image of the open ramp. Hovering as low as possible, she edged the freighter across the platform. Her montrals flinched at a metal-rending screech. _Oops._

She stretched the bond to its limits and performed the equivalent of a primal scream. _‘Down!’_

As Barriss dropped, Ahsoka jerked her controls and the freighter spun into a barely controlled 360. The protruding ramp careened into the Inquisitor and sent him flying across the platform. He crashed down on the other side, rolling up with a savage expression.

She felt Barriss leap into the loading bay, and the ramp resealing light blinked. Exhaling the oppressive fear, Ahsoka spiraled toward the stars at full throttle.

_______

Barriss crumpled against the bay wall. Walking any further was too much. Everything was too much.

Ahsoka skidded onto the upper level walkway and then slid down the ladder. Kneeling in front of Barriss, her eyes roved over the injuries. “We’re on our way to a rebel medcenter, but let’s get you stabilized.” She gingerly examined the wasted arm. “Blast it, Barriss. Why didn’t you wait for me? We could have done this together. You almost died!”

She gazed at nothing. “I know. It was stupid.” Exhausted misery settled into her soul. “Luminara’s gone. So long ago. They made her suffer, others suffer. It’s my fault.”

Hands jerked up to grip her face. “That is _not_ true.”

Her eyelids felt unbearably heavy. As they collapsed, she rasped, “It was… bad, Soka.”

The woman inhaled sharply and then stroked thumbs over her cheeks. “Hey, listen to me. Things are going to be alright. We’ll work through the bad together like always. Got it?”

Forcing her eyes open, Barriss anchored to the steadfast blue. A measure of strength returned to her body. “K.”

“That’s the spirit, kitten.” Ahsoka slid arms underneath her, and they trundled out of the bay.

She mumbled, “I hate that one.”

“You hate all of them, cupcake. Don’t think I can’t tell. _But_ I have good news. In recognition of your unaccountable dislike for every term of endearment I’ve come up with, I decided to consult an authoritative resource.”

Barriss groaned. Last year they’d spent a week on the rebel safe world of Chandrila, exploring the capital city without any missions or threat of impending doom. It had been strange and wonderful to experience an ordinary life filled with window shopping, holoplays, and museum tours. They’d even passed a highly enjoyable night at a local cantina dance-a-thon, not reaching bed until dawn.

Unfortunately, it had an unforeseen side effect. Ahsoka had paid rapt attention to the everyday interactions of any couple they came across like it was pure coaxium. Ever since, the woman had instituted a variety of pet names as if she thought they were missing out on some kind of important romantic ritual. While sweet, it often had truly cringe-worthy results. _At least, she’s not still insisting on ‘pookie’ or ‘honey bunny’. _Though, none had sent Barriss into higher irritation levels than ‘babe’.

A grinning voice continued, “No moaning, sweetkins! You'll see. I have found the perfect expression of my undying adoration, courtesy of your second favorite novel.”

She turned her head to look up at Ahsoka. “You actually read one of my books?”

The woman stuck out pouty lips. “Are you insinuating I can’t read?”

Barriss smirked. “As I recall, you claim novels are unrealistic, far too long, and don’t have nearly enough fight scenes.”

“Can’t say I remember such a conversation,” she replied innocently. “Though, they definitely have nothing on a good holobook.”

“Give it up, Tano. I am so not reading anything called ‘Squib Jedi’.”

“Hey! It’s a classic series of primo literature.”

“For children,” she remarked dryly. “And my _second_ favorite novel?”

“The ‘Coruscant Nights’ one. Ok, so I don’t know if it’s your second favorite, but you did insist I’d enjoy it. And I couldn’t make it through two chapters of your actual favorite, ‘Spacey Beaches’ or whatever.”

“Beach of Stars,” she corrected softly.

“Yeah, yeah. It made my brain hurt.” They reached the medbay, and Ahsoka laid her on the cot.

Barriss lifted her usable hand and ran it across Ahsoka’s chin. “What dedication. I’m such a lucky girl.”

Taking her fingers, she brushed a tender kiss over the tips. “Well, I have an appreciation for anything you love, _dollface._”

Warmth and a shyly pleased smile flushed her cheeks.

Ahsoka lit up with a massive fist pump. “Yesss!” Planting a peck on Barriss’ nose, her grin heightened to supernova levels. “Your entire novel collection is so on my reading list. Even the Beachy Stars of Incomprehensibility.” She bounced away and started whistling a jaunty tune, while digging out medical supplies.

As Barriss watched the woman putter around, comfort seeped into her wounded heart. _My future isn’t finished being told._ Finally losing the battle with her damaged body, she crashed into sleep with a whispered promise. “I’ll make it a good one, Master.”

_______

Barriss assessed the mechanical circuitry inside her upper wrist. She pressed the tips of her fingers together and there was a responding pull in the clicking servos. _Strange._

Her hand was basically still hers. Most of her arm was still hers. All they’d replaced was inner musculature, severed nerves, and a strip of skin from the forearm to the edge of her palm. Yet, the appendage didn’t feel like a part of her.

_You’ll get used to it, Offee. Like everything else._ Barriss resealed the maintenance port in her wrist and laid back down. She stared up at the stone ceiling of the medcenter, tracing cracked rock and discolored patches. Nothing felt quite the same.

A piece of Barriss had died with her master. Perhaps, it was meant to. Everything must die, and she’d been holding onto this particular dream for far too long. Now, there was only cold, unbending truth. No restoration, reconciliation, or reparation was possible. She had to live with that forever. _And I think I… can?_ Yes, something had definitely shifted inside of her. For better or worse, she didn’t know.

Floating an absent gaze across the near empty wing, she watched a doctor tend burns on a rebel mechanic. Until, a familiar figure strolled in the doorway, nodding a cloaked head at the staff as he made his way to her.

_Huh. That’s unexpected._

Bail Organa sat next to her cot, pushing his hood back just enough for Barriss to make out his features. “How are you feeling?”

“Well, I’m alive.” She flexed her fingers with a slight frown. “And they tell me my arm is as good as new.”

He chuckled. “I take it you don’t agree.”

She shifted into a sitting position. “I’m sure I’ll get used to it.”

“Indeed.” He adjusted the pillow behind her back and added quietly, “I am sorry about the outcome of your mission to Stygeon.”

Barriss rubbed trembling fingers over the near invisible access port in her skin. “So, am I.”

His gaze floated off. “We lost a wise, courageous, and compassionate soul. One I always admired.”

Closing burning eyes, she whispered, “Yes.”

There was a moment of silence. “She never lost faith in you, Barriss.”

Her eyelids flipped open. “What?”

He smiled and dug a pad out of his cloak. “I recovered this when Ahsoka asked me to hunt down your records in the Republic archives all those years ago. Given the circumstances, I thought you might want to see it.”

Barriss stared at the device and then forced her gaze back to him. “And what kind of file on me would warrant being kept around this long?”

“Hmm, guess you’ll have to watch it to find out.” Bail placed the pad on a rickety nightstand near her bed. “Whenever you feel ready.”

“You really are incapable of answering a direct question.” she remarked wryly. “Or, is that a special treat reserved for me?”

He laughed. “Well, I know how much you enjoy cryptic puzzles.”

“Uh huh. You maintain a covert dossier on me and then still can’t manage to say so when volunteering information from it. Of course, if I were you, I’d have one on me too.” Barriss snorted. “Just don’t think you’re fooling me. Speaking of, how do I rate a personal visit from the busy, important, and never goes anywhere without a reason Senator Organa? It wasn’t to deliver an old file that could have been sent over subspace.”

A pinched crinkle formed between his eyebrows. “Barriss, I know we didn’t get off to an ideal start when you joined the Rebellion. During the first couple of years, our relationship was…”

“Difficult? Turbulent? Mistrustful? You dreamed of having me clandestinely shipped to the spice mines of Kessel?” she supplied innocently.

“I was going to say _tentative_,” Bail replied with crisp dryness. “However, that is long past. I do care about your wellbeing.”

Barriss blinked. “I’m not sure why you would.”

“Let’s clear up the confusion, shall we? First off, witnessing someone overcoming their past to help others is a rare gift. It reminds me why our fight is so important. Of course, you’re also a valuable asset to have on my side.” He winked. “Beyond the whole mystical Force powers, your skills are extensive. Your intel and analysis work are literally unmatched. Though, do not underestimate the contribution of your organizational abilities. You should have seen the reports—and I use that term generously—Ahsoka sent me prior to you taking over that end.”

She smirked. “I can only imagine. Well, practical and inspirational, huh? This _is_ high praise.”

“Oh, I wasn’t done.” His expression sobered. “Before you returned to Ahsoka’s life, I confess I was worried. Existing in the shadows and keeping hope while loss, betrayal, and tragedy surrounds you isn’t an easy existence. No one can handle it without support, even Jedi.”

Barriss looked away. “No arguments here.”

He took her repaired hand and squeezed it. “My point is Ahsoka Tano was on a path of no return. You changed her course. For that alone, you have my gratitude. My early resistance was much more about Ahsoka than you, honestly. I was concerned if something went wrong, we’d lose her completely. Clearly, she knows her own business better than I do.”

A lump formed in her throat. Swallowing hard, she returned attention to him. “It was mutual. She saved me.”

Bail smiled. “As it should be. Our lives are too short and too challenging to go through them alone. In any case, I have multiple reasons to ensure your continued health and happiness. Though, I must confess, I also simply like you. Not many people have the talent or brazenness to tell me off so effectively with only one concisely worded, impassively delivered cutting remark.”

Barriss laughed. “Very well, sir. I shall accept your sincere regard for my welfare and, of course, any gifted files from my secret dossier. I'll have to cut you down to size more often, now that I know how much you enjoy it.”

He waved an airy hand. “Excellent. Since that’s settled, I do have another purpose for my visit.”

She sent her eyes skyward. “I knew it was too good to be true.”

“Now, now. Leaders multi-task.”

Barriss couldn’t help another laugh. “Alright, glorious leader, what can I do for you?”

His gaze flickered. “I understand you and Ahsoka recently ran into… an old friend.”

“Oh.”

Bail tilted forward in his chair. “After she finished raking me across the mustafarian coals, Ahsoka left me with the impression you knew more details about his situation than she did.”

Barriss kept her face impassive. “I’m not sure what you mean. What did she tell you?”

The edges of his mouth twitched. “Only that he captured you, and you both spent the day together before she got there. It was more what Ahsoka didn’t say that interested me. Why?”

“Why?” she echoed.

He gave her his trademark look. If it was possible for someone to appear simultaneously amused, concerned, and frustrated, Bail Organa had it mastered. “_Why_ would a man holed up for years suddenly reveal himself to a woman he hadn’t seen since her conviction for terrorist acts? I’m not a fool, Barriss. Something happened to bring him out of hiding. What was it?”

She shrugged. “You’d have to ask him. Though, I think you’re reading alot into events. I imagine he simply suspected I was an Imperial agent hunting him and went on the offensive. In any case, it took most of the day for us to work through the past and come to a mutual understanding.” Barriss paused and added intently, “Trust is a fragile thing, Senator.”

Bail assessed her for several moments and then a smile formed. “That’s all I needed. I can see his secrets are safe with you, as is the welfare of his… mission.”

Her eyes narrowed. “Perhaps, you are the one who knows more than you will admit.”

He brushed lint from his cloak. “Or, that is merely the impression I generate. A natural byproduct of being a politician, I suppose.”

“Uh huh. I’ll let it go _this _time, Organa.” Spotting a new arrival in the medcenter door, Barriss smiled happily.

Bail twisted around and then grunted. “I can see I’m about to be outranked.” His expression intensified. “Before Ahsoka crashes into us with what appears to be the entire supply of flowers in this sector, I need a favor. If anything ever happens to me, will you give our mutual friend a message?”

She stared and then slowly nodded. “I’ll do what I can.”

The man leaned into her ear. “Tell him… I would trust her with everything.”

“Right. I’m not even going to try to deduce that one,” Barriss said ruefully. “I have enough secrets for one lifetime.”

He laughed and patted her arm. “Very wise, my dear. Very wise, indeed.”

_______

Ahsoka watched as Bail squeezed Barriss’ hand with a supportive smile. They seemed more comfortable around each other than usual. _About time._ Giving her own farewell to the man, she settled into his vacated chair.

Cobalt eyes surveyed the literal wall of blooms lining the other side of her cot. “Did you leave flowers for anyone else to buy their injured loved ones?”

She slapped a hand over her heart. “Absolutely not. You deserve them all.” Shifting forward, Ahsoka kissed the alluring lips. “Only the best for you.”

Barriss gazed at her for a long moment. “I love you so much.”

“Now, _that_ is the appropriate response when the woman you adore brings you flowers.”

“Duly noted.”

Letting her fingers wander over diamond tattoos, Ahsoka asked, “How are you feeling?”

“Ok.” She raised her arm and flexed the muscles. “This feels weird, but I guess I’ll get used to it.”

“Hmm, you better. Barriss Offee’s hands, especially her ridiculously limber fingers, are a critical part of my life happiness.”

The woman giggled. She laid the hand in question on Ahsoka’s cheek. “You know, my wrist muscles aren’t going to get tired anymore. The possibilities could be endless.”

She licked her lips. “Oh, my brain is already improvising strategies.”

“Are you sure your brain is involved?”

Ahsoka delivered another tender kiss. “I warn you, Offee. One more snarky remark and I’ll take drastic action.”

“Promise?”

“Definitely.” She hovered over Barriss’ mouth. “Mmm, I need you to get shipshape a little faster, please.”

Flicking a tongue out to tag Ahsoka’s lips, she grinned. “I’m working on it.”

Sighing in regret, Ahsoka straightened back up. “Work faster, dollface.”

“Yes, ma’am.” Wrapping the healed arm around her stomach, Barriss went unusually still.

Her mood dipped. “What is it?”

“Do you think—” Grimacing, she laid flat and stared at the ceiling. After a few silent moments, Barriss turned her head to Ahsoka. “I feel _different._ The strangest part is I think I’m going to be ok.”

Ahsoka furrowed her brow. “Uh, and is that a bad thing?”

“I don’t know. That’s what I’m asking.”

Now, her entire face scrunched. “Yeah, I’m missing something. Why do you think you shouldn’t be ok?”

Barriss gazed at some invisible point in the air between them. “Because I never got the chance to make it right, to tell her how important she was to my life. Luminara died believing she failed me and I her. I wanted to at least partly restore the faith she once had in me. I needed to show her the _ real _ me—the person I always hid from her and who I’ve become. The hope of doing any of that is gone. Yet, I’m still ok.”

Ahsoka blew breath into her cheeks and then released it. “I understand. You aren’t the only one who feels like they failed their master and lost the chance to fix it.”

Concerned eyes jerked back to hers. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to—”

“Stop that,” Ahsoka interrupted. Moving onto the cot, she leaned over Barriss. “I didn’t mention it for you to feel guilty, selfish, or some other nonsense. I brought it up as an explanation.”

“Huh?”

She stroked her face. “Remember, Barriss Offee, we can handle anything together. More than that, we understand each other in a way others can't. I’m saying maybe you’re ok, because you’re not alone.”

A small grin formed. “Maybe so, Tano. I’m always ok when I have you.”

“Me too.” Gently tracing a diamond, Ahsoka added, “Besides, Luminara didn’t fail. She gave her apprentice the tools to survive when others perished. Developed the skills now used to fight injustice and cruelty. Encouraged the resiliency and faith to push through darkness. Instilled the determination and discernment that girl relied on to find who she was meant to be. Her apprentice walks a path of service, compassion, and wisdom—just as she once walked. You are the full fruition of her labor. So, yes, you definitely should be ok. Because, wherever she is, Luminara Unduli is _proud._”

She closed her eyes as tears leaked from the corners. “And so is Anakin Skywalker.”

Ahsoka’s chest tightened. Touching her forehead to Barriss’, she murmured, “It’s up to us now. We won’t let them down.”

Barriss smiled. “Deal.”

_______

Her whitening fingers clenched the pad from Bail. Barriss sat up straighter in her cot and read the recording’s ominous label once more. Her brain conjured scenario after scenario about its potential contents. _You can handle whatever truth it holds. Face the past and move forward._

Steadying her churning stomach, Barriss activated ‘PN2187_Offee_FinalAppeal_Unduli’.

Luminara Unduli’s serene countenance materialized on the screen. _“Good day, Chancellor. I was kindly given the opportunity by Senator Amidala to add my support to Barriss Offee’s appeal for clemency. The Jedi Council have insisted I preface my remarks by stipulating this message in no way reflects their official stance. They have chosen to let the will of the Force decide matters.” _

_The lines of her face hardened. “I believe the Force requires us to take charge of our own destinies. It certainly does not pay heed to political considerations. Therefore, I come before you today as a private citizen of the Republic.”_

_She took a deep breath. “We are fighting a conflict of pain and violence. Many of us find their principles challenged everyday. That is never more evident than the young woman whose appeal you are now considering. We may deplore how she delivered her message, but it doesn’t change who Barriss Offee is.”_

_“She is a girl of unwavering commitment, idealistic principles, and deep compassion. This may not be obvious from her crimes. Those admirable traits skewed into destructive turmoil, when she was forced to turn them against themselves. The very things that make her so uniquely special are what resulted in such tragic outcomes.” _

_Luminara looked away, before dragging a sad gaze back to the recorder. “We created the natural end result of a perfect Jedi. Someone who detached herself from emotion and those she cared for, used her exceptional abilities to save what she saw as a collapse of our values, and was willing to sacrifice everything for a perceived greater good.”_

_Letting out a heavy sigh, she continued, “I know there are some that wish to see her receive the harshest penalty for what I cannot deny are terrible actions. However, I also know something those people do not.”_

_The woman leaned forward, voice crackling with radiant intensity. “Barriss Offee has a greater destiny. Whether she finds it in a prison cell or elsewhere is irrelevant. If given the opportunity, Barriss _will_ take it. I am more certain of that than of the stars continuing to shine. I beg you to give her that chance.” _

_She blinked rapidly as tears misted behind the cerulean blue. “A young light with so much promise should not be extinguished, because she could not countenance the terrible things we asked of her. Punish her actions, if justice demands it. Though, I doubt you will ever be able to match the punishment she inflicts on herself. Either way, her death serves no one. It merely deprives the galaxy of someone who could better it. If that happens, we are all damaged.”_

_Her eyes blazed to life once more. “Barriss Offee has a future yet to be told. I know in my soul it will be a good one. Please… let her write it.”_

_Luminara’s face resumed its familiar impassivity, and she inclined her head. “Thank you for your time and consideration. I look forward to your wise judgement in this matter.” _

The video blipped out, but Barriss couldn’t see it anymore. Tears flooded her vision, rounded drops spattering onto the pad. Her heart shattered and rebuilt itself in each moment. _You always saw me._

Curling up, she hugged the pad to her chest. “I did it, Master. Your faith wasn’t in vain. It _is_ a good one.” Warm, cerulean eyes shined back from somewhere deep within her soul. As Barriss Offee cried, she smiled.


End file.
